One tire, two tire, flat tire, blew tire...

I have learned more about changing tires in the past three weeks than in all of my thirty-four years.

I was getting ready to go to my sister's birthday party at the end of June and I noticed that my front passenger tire was a little low. We went out and got some fix-a-flat and drove it around, pumped it up to full capacity and that seemed to do it. It was totally fine for MONTHS!

Three weeks ago the trouble started.

J and I got home from grocery shopping and I hear HISSSSSSSSSS. The freaking tire is FLAT. Rim touching the ground flat. Thankfully we were at home when it happened and not on the way home with a carload of groceries.

Jim and our old neighbor Kevin came over in the middle of the night and changed the tire. We put the donut on it and it said that it can be driven for about 50 miles.

Lisa called me from the grocery store two days later and told me that the donut blew out and she was at least able to slowly drive it into a parking lot. She let the store owner know that it was there and that we would take care of it as soon as possible. Then she had to walk home.

Anyone who lives paycheck to paycheck knows how this went. We had just paid all of our bills so we only had enough money for gas for the week, and barely at that. So, we have to wait until the next payday to replace the tire.

I called around to EVERY SINGLE STORE THAT SOLD TIRES in a thirty mile radius and Walmart was the only place that sold CHEAP tires. So, payday arrived and Jon and I went to Walmart, got our tire, went back to the parking lot, and changed it.

Actually, I changed it. I asked him to show me how because, since I drive an older car, I thought it was possible I might actually need to change a tire. It was the first tire I had ever learned how to change in 34 years. I KNOW that every child that lives in our house and drives any of our vehicles will know how to change a tire.

I mean, if you have never changed a tire before, go and look in the trunk for the jack. Where is it??? I never thought to acclimate myself to WHERE the jack was, just figured that when I needed it, IF I needed it, I would be able to find it. Let me just say, if you have never changed a tire before, GO AND LOOK IN THE TRUNK FOR THE JACK!!!

My jack was hidden behind a cute unmarked little door. It was put in there by some puzzle-maker and they forgot to leave directions. Who knows that these things are there? Do people go into car dealerships and ask to be shown these things when they buy a car? Shouldn't it be part of the selling process?

"Thanks for coming to Bob's Used Vehicles, we have plenty of cars, and each one has it's own complicated procedure for changing a tire. Step this way and we will begin!" No wonder it takes HOURS to shop for a car.

Mini-vans usually have a little panel clearly marked with JACK on the front of it in the "trunk" on one of the side walls. Full-sized vans have a compartment under the back bench for the jack and any tire changing accoutrements. Pick up trucks have tire changing equipment hidden in a compartment behind the passenger side seat, also made by a puzzle-maker. If you can figure out how to get the compartment open, there is a little plastic sheet of instructions strapped into the arrangement. Find that first. Makes the whole process a LOT easier!

One other important step. Make sure that you read your vehicle manual to figure out exactly where you are supposed to place your jack. Most cars have you place it right behind whichever front tire you are changing and right in front of whichever back tire you are changing. However, you HAVE to put it on part of the FRAME of the car. You can't just put the jack anywhere, trust me on this. Make sure that you know where the jack goes in case of flat tires. Get under the car and familiarized yourself with the spot. Mark it with purple nailpolish or spray paint, then you won't forget.

Then you need to locate the spare tire. My spare tire was hidden in an unmarked compartment under the carpet of the trunk. The van's tire was obviously on the back of the vehicle in a cute little cover with a locking thingie on it, try getting that little lock off in the heat of trying to change a tire on the side of the highway with cars zooming past you. May as well bring a sledge hammer.

The pick-up truck's spare tire was the most fun. It was under the bed of the truck. You had to get the little directions out of the jack box. After you read them, it was much easier to get the tire down. There is a little screwdriver end on the lug wrench. You stick the screwdriver into a hole on the tailgate and unscrew it, it drops the tire down on a wire so you can pull it out. That was the most fun I have had all month.

Okay, so back to the tire changing story. That was one tire and two tire, on to flat tire.

No sooner than we fixed the car, I noticed that the van (which has been parked in our driveway for about four months) is listing to one side. It's front driver side tire is flat-to-the-rim-flat. What the hell is going on? So, I pulled out the cigarette lighter operated tire pump that we borrowed from Jim and pumped it up. It was fine. For about a week. Still flat, van still lists, we don't drive it so it's not really a priority. Eventually we will have to fix it if we want to sell the van.

I tell Jon, after so much exposure to flat tires, that his passenger side tire looked like it needed a little air.

A week goes by.

I noticed that Jon's passenger side tire looked like it needed a little air.

One more week goes by.

It was 11PM I needed something from Jon's truck. I went out to get it and his front passenger side tire was flat, on the rim flat. I went into the house and asked him if he had put air in the tire, he said that he forgot.

SIGH.

I go out and hook up the tire to the air pump and notice that I can see the steel belting sticking out. Not usually a good sign, but, it inflates and stays full. The morning arrives and the tire is flat. Okay, now Lisa needs to get up and drive Jon to work. Then she has to go to work. Later in the evening, someone needs to pick Jon up at work. This is how the week went, because as you know, we had just paid the bills and couldn't afford the tire until the next week's paycheck.

Finally it's Friday, tomorrow after I get off of work, I am going to go and get the tire for the truck. I am heading out to pick Jon up at work. I am running late, I went grocery shopping and have all of the groceries in the car, except the freezer stuff which I had dropped off. I am halfway there and the car started making this really weird grinding sound and here is where "blew tire" comes in. Front DRIVER'S side this time.

Crap crap crappity crap crap crap.

Okay, I am in my car. It is 7:20ish at night. I am on a busy highway. I am halfway in-between home and Jon's work. I am also halfway in-between two exits, each 3/4 mile away. I have no cell phone. What is the protocol? What are you SUPPOSED to do? Stay with the car? Find a phone? Will I get towed if I am not here to explain that I will get the tire fixed, but I can't afford a tow and I can't get a new tire until tomorrow? And I don't even know if I can afford the second tire. What am I going to do? Someone is sure to stop and see if I need help.

Five minutes go by.
Ten minutes go by.
Fifteen minutes go by.
Twenty minutes go by.

Meanwhile, unbeknownst to me, Jon has called home around 7:45PM to find out where someone is to pick him up. Lisa told him that I had left quite awhile ago and should be there any minute.

The sun is starting to set. Soon it will be dark. Nobody has stopped to see if they can help me. I start the car and pull over onto the shoulder so that I am more than halfway onto the grass. About four to five feet away from traffic. I get out and go and sit on the car, thinking I can try to hail someone.

Nobody stopped, ever. That makes me sad. It also makes me aware that if I see others stranded on the side of the road that I need to stop and offer assistance. Whatever happened to courtesy? That must be another blog...

Finally, I took out my lipstick and wrote, "Call 911 please!" on the back window and on the side windows I wrote "Call Police"

Well, nobody stopped to help me and it took the police 1/2 hour to get there.

Two police cars, lights blazing, sirens blaring, tasers drawn, on the loud-speaker, "Driver are you okay?!" I said, "YES!" They turn off the sirens, lights, put away tasers, and the lead officer walks over to me and asks me if I had written "Call 911" on my car. Yes? (I'm thinking, do you see other people here? Who the heck else would it have been?)

I said, "Was that the wrong thing to do? I have been out here for over 1/2 hour, I have no cell phone and I didn't know if I could find a pay phone anywhere nearby because I am not familiar with the area." He said, "I understand what you were trying to do, but we got three phone calls to 911 that you were a kidnap victim and had written this message on your window."

WHAT? You have to be kidding? Doesn't that kind of stuff only happen on "Cops" on Fox? I am close to tears because nobody stopped to help me, I don't have any money on me to call anyone, I am really late to pick up Jon, and the cop is giving me a hard time for writing a message on my car to try and get help.

He is generous and gives me 16 hours to get my car moved or it will be towed.

He will give me a ride to the police station and I can have someone pick me up there. He calls Lisa on his cell phone. Needless to say, I'm sorry it was her on the other end of the phone hearing, "Lisa? This is Deputy so and so with the Walworth County sheriff's Department. I am with your friend Kim." He doesn't say right away that I am okay. I can hear Lisa on the phone, trying not to panic, saying, "Okay..."

After he called Lisa, he gave me a ticket for having an expired driver's license. I have five days to get a new one or I get a warrant for my arrest. Then he told me to have a great night.

After all of this, Lisa came to the police station to get me, we stopped at the car and got the groceries out of it. Then we went to get Jon who has now been at work an extra 2 1/2 hours past when he should have been home. Jon and I have to be at work on Saturday at 7AM. After I get off at 10AM, I have to go to the car and get the old tire off. I have to put the blown donut on it because you can't leave it up on a jack, as it's a safety hazard. Then I have to drive to Walmart and have them put the tire on the rim and then go back, jack the car back up, take the donut off, and get the new tire on it. Then I have to go home and get Lisa or someone to drive with me back to the car and drive it to Jon. Then we have to go home. All this time hoping that I can do this in 1 1/2 hours because it's going to be towed at 12 Noon and with my luck the truck will be waiting at 11:59AM.

So, I thought it would be a good idea to stop at the sheriff's department and ask if I could have an extension. I didn't want the car to be towed while I was waiting three hours at Walmart for my new tire.

The deputy on duty was the nicest man ever! He called over to make sure that it wouldn't be towed. Then I asked him what the protocol should be if that ever happens again. Should I walk and find a phone? Should I stay with the car? He is preparing to answer me and I glance over and see a sign that says, "Stay with your vehicle! You are too important to your loved ones to walk down the highway and risk your life!" I just about died laughing. They even have emergency signs that have the symbol of a phone and POLICE. They are red and they hang off of your window, you roll it down a little and clip it on, then roll it up. It's printed on both sided and is about 18 inches long. He gave me two and told me if I needed more to come and get them.

Then I went to Walmart feeling confident that my car would still be there.

I changed my tire all by myself. I was really proud.

When I got home, I took a nap, got up, made dinner, then went out to change Jon's truck tire. We had totally forgotten all week that he had a spare tire under the bed. We get the tire down and on the truck and it's flat, rim-on-the-ground-flat! We hook it up to the battery operated pump and the psi is going up, and all of a sudden it goes down. Then we hear HISSSSSSSSS.

So, back to Walmart, where the cost of the replacement wasn't as bad as we thought.

I had Megan help me change it when I got back. She's seven. Figured you are never too young to learn.

We have nine more tires that can be changed, that's one for each of us!

Wealth

Are you wealthy only in a monetary sense or is wealth more?

Is wealth the number of dollars in your bank account or is wealth the number of people you call friends?

Is wealth the amount you paid for your home, car, or possessions or is wealth the number of hugs and kisses you get at the end of a busy day?

Is wealth the true test of integrity or is wealth when your children stay together to fight the bully who is picking on one of theirs, sending the youngest and fastest home to get help so that they are stronger in numbers?

Is wealth a sign of honesty or is wealth when your oldest comes to you and asks forgiveness because he broke your favorite dish?

Is wealth a declaration of dedication or is wealth the satisfaction at the end of a 12 hour day when you are tired because you worked hard but you love what you do and that you provided for yourself and your family?

Is wealth how many pairs of shoes you can buy or is wealth the quantity of kid art on your walls that would look just as good gracing the walls of any art museum?

Is wealth based on how exclusive your vacations are or is wealth the night you camp out in the backyard under the stars just because the kids want you to?

Is wealth how many times you eat at a restaurant or is wealth how many times you hear, "This is SO good! You should open a restaurant and serve this!"?

Is wealth how fancy your clothes are or is wealth the t-shirt you and your child made together with paint and footprints?

Is wealth the fancy library of books that is so large it collects dust or is wealth the book that has been read so many times that the binding is taped on and some of the pages are worn and you can read it by heart, and still do, because someone said, "PUHLEEZ?"?

Is wealth fancy toys with fancy price tags or is wealth the little car or the piggie bank or the swirlie hanging in your tree that grandpa made for you?

Is wealth a private lodge in the woods or is wealth the old canvas tent that holds all of the mornings, afternoons, and evenings of meals shared, games played, and stories told?

Is wealth just monetary or is wealth more?