95 days

So over there on the right, under the heading "links" is a new link that's called "60 miles is a BIG deal."

Go and check it out.

I'll even make it easier on you, you can click here: Janeen's Link
Her team link is here, check them out too! Froggies

My friend Janeen is walking in the Breast Cancer 3 Day in 95 days and she needs some help getting to her goal and exceeding it.

I stole this right from that link, go and check it out, it's some amazing stuff.

The Breast Cancer 3-Day is a 60-mile walk over the course of three days. Net proceeds benefit Susan G. Komen for the Cure and National Philanthropic Trust, funding important breast cancer research, education, screening, and treatment.

I am so proud of her for training for this and working toward this goal in everything she does. I'm proud to call her friend and know that it's returned.

So, count your blessings and go click on that link and see what you can do.

You might could help!

Grateful

Thinks I'm grateful for today:

• The man that invented air conditioning--Willis Haviland Carrier
• The man that invented deodorant--an unknown inventor to this day, we thank him!
• The daughter that amazes me with the blog--Caetie
• The son that amazes me with his brain--Mike
• The son that simply amazes me--J
• The mom that answers IM's.
• The pop that calls just to make sure that I'm okay...over and over and over again. :)
• Roommates
• The friend that always calls because we are bff's.
• The friend that is always there with a kind word or to share a meal.
• The friend that calls to hear my voice when they need it.
• The friend that always calls when I need to hear her voice.
• The friend that finally signed and had a cathartic cry.
• Whoever invented the term "closure".
• Pool parties
• A washer and dryer in the house.
• Tennessee
• Someone that says, "let me help..." and means it.
• Someone that says, "What can I do to make it better?" and means it.
• Food in the fridge.
• Food shared with friends.
• Sex--hey, I can be grateful for the memories of it...
• Splitting the rent and utilities 3 ways.
• Blogs
• Digital cameras
• Hot showers
• Big fluffy feather comforters
• The possibilities in paint.
• Garth
• Bob
• Questions
• Answers
• I'm just gonna say one more point for Willis Haviland Carrier, he rocks.
• Bald men
• Geeky boys that play cards at the game shop
• dictionary.com
• staying up really late
• long phone calls with old friends--btw, I did steal the memory
• Good Will Hunting--always reminds me of Patrick
• Books

Friendship

Now, maybe I am doing this whole friendship thing wrong.

I guess I always thought that people were who they were and we, as their friends, accepted that about them.

When people change in order to grow, adapt, and evolve, sometimes we as friends don't get to go along for that ride, for whatever reason. Sometimes we are only in each other's lives for a short time.

Sometimes we don't like what they grew, adapted, or evolved into. That shouldn't mean that it's a bad thing, nor should it mean that there is any reason to be hurtful or spiteful.

I would hope that if I'm ever in this position that I remember that at one point in time, I loved who that person was and miss them. I would hope that my words would be tempered by love and care instead of jealousy, anger, and resentment.

I hope that I remember that it just means that for this moment in time we are both following a different path that hopefully intersects again.

I would hope to be happy for a friend to find what they are looking for, searching for, seeking out. I hope that I would be proud that they are happy, healthy, strong, able, and willing to live life to it's fullest. I hope I am able to be joyous that I had the opportunity to have that person in my life.

I am proud of all of my friends. I am so thankful for each and every person that's touched my life in little ways or big ways. I hope that my friends know this.

I have grown, adapted, and evolved into the person you see today and even though I have changed, I've also never strayed from being true to myself.

Sometimes my road has had a couple of bends in it and maybe even some hills.

Know what I like best about them? There's always something new, exciting, and different, around the bends and over the hills. You can always find joy in the journey. Sometimes it's more difficult to find that joy and yet it's always worth looking.

Oh, and I don't know if you have ever read one of my favorite quotes:

"At eighty, I think what I shall regret are the things I always wanted to do and never did; the experiences I denied myself because I was too concerned about others' opinions, or too anxious for their approval; but I think I would regret most a life wasted living as someone who was not me."-anonymous

That's who I am, it's who I hope I'll always be.

Full Moon Week

So, there I was, it was a week like any other, only it was a full moon week.
My second in Tennessee.

As the moon was waxing to full, the week was unfolding. It turned out to be an amazing week.

Monday was a lazy day of getting productive on my room. I rearranged it and hung some pictures and made it more like home. I did some laundry and cleaned the kitchen. I hung up pictures of the kids and by the kids and I feel like they are here with me in spirit.

Tuesday I had a friend over for dinner. I made ham & kugali because it was a Tuesday and I could. I told all the stories that we'd tell over the Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner table. The Twins in the Apple Barrel, the Roller Skates. I can't wait to tell them the Hawk Lady story. I love that one. We've been eating the leftovers all week. They are great with a scrambled egg in the middle. Yum. I also made three desserts, mainly because then my roommate could take some leftovers to work for the hungry people there. I made Oreo Truffles, Almond and Vanilla Biscotti, and tCakes. They were all delightful. After we stuffed ourselves, we went to Steve & Barry's at the mall and my friend bought me a really cool t-shirt and got a really cool shirt for themselves. I love it. The company was better than the food or the stuff any day of the week.

Wednesday I got some pictures from Pop at work, one of Caetie, one of Mike, and one of J. They made me miss those faces and love them from TN. I hope that they looked up at the full moon and felt me missing them. After work I went out to Waffle House with a friend from work. She's kookie, I kind of enjoy her company. We are going to make Wednesday nights our "girl's night out" from now on, I think.

Thursday was game night at the home of some new friends. It was a lot of fun. I've never played Scene It before. I think that J would love this game. I'll never think the same of Spite & Malice again and listening to the game Beer Money with the group of friends that were playing was almost as entertaining as the games. The company was great and it was a lot of fun. I'm glad that I was included among the guests.

Friday was a long night at work. I came home and did some laundry and watched some tv and read a book and it was a good night to chillax and regroup and recharge.

Saturday we got out of work before 11:30PM on an ad night. I was amazed. I was stunned. I thought, KARAOKE! I decided to spend some time at the bar with the friends and the singing and the adorable bartender and it was actually a lot of fun. I talked about Caetie because one of my friends runs a haunted house that they wrote the storyline for. She is also writing a graphic novel and I think that Caetie would really enjoy her conversation. I'm glad that I went out and had fun and was silly. I got home and read until I fell asleep.

Sunday I woke up and thought of the kids. They only have a few weeks of summer vacation left. I hope that they are having a great time. I hope that J is enjoying the beach. I think he has gills, he loves the water so. I took a shower and settled in to read when a friend called and asked what I was doing. Well, nothing, come on over before I head to work. We had a great visit and I can't wait to see them again. They just make me laugh and I feel so much better when I have a day of laughter over a day of self-involvement. I thought of the sock all day and it just made me giggle.

The moon is starting to wane again and tonight on my way home it was at the horizon and it was huge and red. It was amazing.

I can't wait to see what the next week has to bring.

I hope that you are here with me in person or in spirit.

Today...

So, today was good.

It was a beautiful day in Tennessee.

The sun was shining, it was about 87 with really low humidity and tonight it dropped to about 60. So perfect and beautiful.

I got up and went to work early this morning, not a normal thing because I've been closing so much.

I work about 11 miles away from home, which is roughly a 15-20 minute drive. The drive to work is magnificent. I drive by two state parks and Percy Priest Lake and drive over a bridge with lake on both sides of me. Well, in the morning, it is breath-taking. The rolling hills behind the lake and the trees, the way the water glistens in the sunlight.

The smell. It's just...Tennessee. It's like Woodhaven after it rains only multiplied by a million. Can you imagine how it smells after it rains here? It's like heaven in a breath.

I was so overwhelmed that I almost whooped and threw my arm out the window like I was on a roller coaster and then I remembered what happened last time so I sucked my arm into the car immediately.

Here's the link to the old post.

Driving the hills of TN...

I promise to be a passenger sometime soon so I can take pictures of my ride to work so you can see.

I just want to thank all of my friends in Tennessee, Wisconsin, Illinois, and Florida for sending me good vibes and good karma this week. I appreciate each and every one of you more than I can say and it humbles me to have such great friends. I don't know what I did to deserve you but I'm so glad the universe loves me. It's good to be back among the happy and uplifted.

I still have moments where I miss the kids and the "familiar".

I'll always have moments when I miss the kids.

Hopefully I will figure out where everything is soon, though.

I think this week is off to a smashing start and can't wait to see how it unfolds!

Have a wonderful, happy, astonishing week and don't forget to look for the blessings, they always outweigh!

Lesson

"Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want, doesn't mean they don't love you with everything they have." --anonymous

I don't know who said it originally, but this sentence has so much meaning in my life.
It's a lesson I had to put before myself again.

I had it brought to my attention just last night and thought it needed to be where I could see it.

Don't forget to notice the details, just because they aren't YOUR details, doesn't mean they count for less.

In fact, they should count for more because they are given freely because that is how you are loved by that person.

Things I've learned in TN in 30 days...

These may not be the only things I've learned in thirty days, but they are the ones I'm commenting on...

• It's funny how life works sometimes.


• Sometimes you think you need something and really what you need is almost totally opposite of that.


• It's a good feeling to figure that out.


• Ovens don't work the same in humidity.


• Cookies are better when they are shared.


• Hot tubs are better naked.


• People you work with become friends when you hang out with them away from work.


• Laughing is good therapy.


• Sweating is good therapy.


• Cooking with someone tells you more about them than you knew before.


• Cooking with someone is very intimate, but not in a sexual way.


• Risotto is foreplay. Eat with caution.


• The zoo is amazing, even when they move the elephants.


• I love playing with other people's dogs.


• I have friends that are willing to share their mom's because mine is far, far away.
  
• Sometimes hanging out and talking about stuff is just what you didn't know you needed.
  
• Kie always calls when I need to hear her voice.
  
• I have good friends in Wisconsin.
  
• I have good friends in Tennessee.
  
• I cannot wait for my Wisconsin friends to meet my Tennessee friends and vice versa.
  
• Sometimes friends really know how to irritate the hell out of you, and sometimes it's on purpose.
  
• I miss those three of mine.
  
• I LOVE Caetie's blog.
  
• I love blogging.
  
• Never leave home without your camera.
  
• Always count your blessings, they always outweigh.
  
• I'll never look at pizza cutters the same again.
  
• RHPS is fun no matter how many times you have seen it and if someone really "knows" it sits next to you, it's even more fun.
  
• There is a Greek dish made with phyllo and cheese that reminds me of Gogi.
  
• I want to make pierogi and share them.
  
• I want someone to make good on their cannoli promise.
  
• I want pancakes.
  
• Through all of the ups and downs of the last thirty days, through all of the happy and sad, the good and the bad, the wonderful and the ugly, when I click my heels together I still end up in Tennessee, so above all else, it's good to be home.

The Universe...

So, I was in this "poor me" mood on Sunday. I even had an entire blog about how miserable I was that day.

I didn't post it because I had to go to work.

On my way to work a friend called me. I sobbed to them on the phone and their advice was to clean up, look at myself in the mirror, and tell myself, "Everything is going to be okay."

The thing is, I did it, but without conviction. I looked at myself in the mirror and said, "You know what? Everything IS going to be okay." Figured that it couldn't hurt and who knows, it might even help.

You know what? It didn't help.

Until you see how the universe works in my world...

My friend from work asked me the moment I got in if I was okay, because I had been crying. Well, that started the crying all over again. Poor boy.

He handed me an empty film container and told me the simple truths about empty film containers: They are a replenishable resource, we will always get more. They are free. You can throw them easily at things that upset you.

The friend I was on the phone with earlier stopped by to see my face and see if I was okay and stayed with me for my break.

I got home that night and saw this on the door to my vanity. It says, "Choose with no regret."
The next morning, I saw this on the counter. A friend gave it to me in WI when I was feeling this exact same way. It says, "Never Look Back, Life is a Miracle Unfolding."

Then, I found this.

The friend that introduced me to the dragon is the same friend that said, "Everything is going to be okay," and that is how serendipitious my life is.

Lessons learned:

The friends that are worth keeping are the ones that aren't only there when things are pretty, but also when they are grey and sad and sometimes ugly.

The times when you think you are touching bottom are the best times to reach out and see if someone grabs ahold of your hand.

It's never as bad as it seems.

If you are lost, alone, empty, find the dragon.

The dragon is not as much fun without someone to giggle with.

Empty film containers hit objects in a satisfactory manner.

Everything IS going to be okay.