I found this post half written from July 6, 2008 and it's still fitting for how I'm feeling now, too.
I've realized that I have gotten to the place that I wanted to be six months ago.
It's been a long six months and some of it's been really hard, but some of it's been pretty freakin' sweet, too.
I have good friends, there are "hangouts", there is normalcy in an abnormal world.
My life wouldn't be complete without having Tuesdays.
Calling "The Corner", Sandbar all of the time.
Finding places to eat and shop at.
Having places where people know your face.
Monday, Friday, Saturday poker.
Being at work and having someone come in and going, "Hey! I know you, how are you today?"
This all being said, I am publishing the original post because it reminds me to remember that sometimes I know the answers and the questions are just rhetorical anyway.
It's hard getting used to living in Tennessee and not having the "same" as you did before.
The same laundromat, the same friends, the same hangouts, the same restaurants...
It's harder than one might think.
It's hard to be so far away from the sound of a voice and the look of a face.
It's hard to be alone and still surrounded by friends.
Baby steps to rebuild what took so long to build in the first place.
That is the best part, too, though. The self-actualization. The self-realization that you can and will rebuild a life again.
The friends will come, that is just a given.
The restaurants will become "favorites".
The hangouts will arrive.
The "normalcy" will return.
I just hate the transition period, the waiting.
I hate not knowing the answers and having to wait for the questions.
I love it here. I love the people, the land, the smell, the tastes--everything.
It's seeped into my essense and become a part of who and what I am.
I'm having a rough day today. It's a struggle to be positive.
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